It's all so real...

At least it has really started to feel real. I am talking about my relationship with Rodney.

We have officially decided to move forward. I had my reservations/hesitations but have realized when love is staring you in the face it's best not to turn away.

I will now be looking for a job here in the Owasso area. That way I can go ahead and move in with my Man. I still just cant believe this is happening. Not really sure why, it just seems so weird. Like life-changing weird. In a good way though...

We just spent the entire weekend apart bcs the son was here, ( not sure what the situation will be the next he visits.) Anyway, I spent the weekend at home but we did speak on the phone several times. At least a dozen or more :) I did miss him and could not wait until Sunday evening when I could be with him again. I could tell he felt the same way, and well, he simply told me so. I think the time apart did us some good. It gave us a chance to be away from each other and see how we felt. I thought about him a lot and know for sure that I want to be with him. I can already see our lives together.

I talked to Mom a couple of times too. Things are going nicely between us even though she is pretty stressed right now. I will most likely be seeing her sometime this week. She has already met R and she seems to like him. I am glad for that. Of course they only met briefly but if she had anything to say about him she would have done so...

Even though I have met R and things are going great and for the first time in months I feel content, I still feel strange. Not sure why or what the feeling is, I just cant shake it. Perhaps I am scared about having to face the world again. Nope I dont think that's it. Perhaps, I am scared about really stating a life w R. Nope, dont think that's it either...well maybe it's part of it. Perhaps, it's that now I have something to lose and I know how much losing something sucks. Especially when you lose everything you have all at the same time. Talk about life-shattering!!!
I have realized I am rambling on...

I guess I will sign off for now until I have something better to write about. Things could get very interesting, as there's a lot that will be happening with me...so I would keep reading if I were you.

Much love