Sorry it's been so long since my last post. I have been in the worst possible mood for over a week now. I am not exactly sure why either. I have been getting plenty of sleep and eating right but I still feel tired and very run-down. Or maybe I am just unmotivated. ???
I have broken off all contact with George but that's not what my problem is. Hell, maybe it is...
I just know that I have been having to force myself to be pleasant and polite. Which is usually not the case with me. I dont want to do anything or go anywhere. I have been even slacking off on my appearance, which is really uncharacteristic of me. I am so vain, and for me to not care what I look like, something's up. Now, if I could just figure out what it is. I will think about it and do some soul searching and let you guys know what I figure out.
Maybe I am lonely ( still, this is not about George ) but like lonely for some friends. I do not really have any. Or at least not any close friends that I hang out with regularly. Macki and I still have not talked since I came home over a month ago. Weird, right? But, I dont think he's the reason behind all this either. Part of it, maybe...but not the real reason. I am not only lonely but also depressed and miserable. Perhaps, I should seek counseling but find it uncomfortable to talk to someone who is a stranger. I dont care if they are doctors or not, a stranger is a stranger. I cant really talk to my parents about this either. They have enough to deal with without me trying to dump my "problems" on them. They always seem so insignificant when I talk to them about something anyway. I know, it all seems insignificant as I am typing but I cant help the way I feel.
I will do another post when I have figured out my problem or talked to someone and they shed some light on the situation.
Justin the miserable.
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